Imnotevenlisteniing

the intimacy of sleeping together, but not in a sexual way. the intimacy of feeling the warmth of their body in a cool room. their hands hugging you tightly. the intimacy of synchronized breathing. sleepy half-kisses. feeling safe. feeling warm. waking up and realizing how much you love them. how precious this is. finding the happiness on the tip of your fingers, brushing their hair. closing your eyes again. pulling closer. falling asleep.

i feel like throwing up when someone compliments me because how could you so blatantly lie to my face like that

I miss the control I used to have.

5 May, 1937 Letters to Véra by Vladimir Nabokov

I want him so badly it's making me sick.