Best Christmas Presents This Year!:

can confirm! this is the 3706th writing tip of all time!

writing tip #3706:

write the first word, then the last word, then the second word, then the second to last word, then keep going until you meet in the middle

FUN *fun* FACT: If you cook a potato (1) (one) (potato) and then you cut it ! in half then you now have TWO (2) baked potatoes !! for the price of 1 (one) !!

why yes it's me again mentally banging my head against my computer desk wondering why Premiere won't export my gifs correctly only to rerealize after several failed attempts that Premiere categorizes GIF and Animated GIF as two separate thing

thank you, googly eyes on the red fire bell on the third floor of the engineering building. some days you're carrying all of us

keep a little mail under my pillow for the 🎵mailmannn🎵

new words just dropped!

written out below:

nonce

sbar

smashticate

bnick

amomous

ctrion

gorikins

kpflus

ktow

shpiln

wug

lspig

go nuts

Hm I might be reblogging more these days BUT I HAVE A STORY!

tl;dr #8 on the aforementioned list is fantastic and *NOT just for flirting*

Last year (actually around this time of year) I was in a store looking for plantains (disappointed in what I could find but hey, the store was in Nevada) and while in the checkout line this old man approaches me just a little too fast and goes

"Do you always look like..." and boy howdy I was ready for some awkward way to avoid the conversation BUT THEN HE GOES "...you're up to something?"

And fellas it's been a long day you have no idea how far I drove and how long I'd been in stores that day

and I just

staring dead-eyed at this random old stranger

say

"Yes."

20 Flirty Remarks to Build Romantic Tension Without Being Overbearing

Feeling stuck trying to give your characters a good flirty one-liner that doesn't sound cringe/overdone? Here are 20 ideas/dialogue prompts for you (that I may or may not have stolen from my own books): 

“I must warn you: you have a dangerous effect on my heart rate.” / "You have no idea what you're doing to my heart right now."

"If I said I wasn’t thinking about you, I’d be lying. And I’m a terrible liar."

"You know, I could get lost in those eyes, but I'd probably trip over my words trying to find my way back." (could also double as description/inner monologue).

“I can’t tell if you’re really charming or if I’m just easily charmed.”

“You have a knack for making me forget what I was going to say. It’s kind of impressive/infuriating.”

“I think you owe me a drink. When I saw you, I dropped mine.”

“I’ve been trying to find the perfect excuse to hang out, but I keep forgetting everything when I’m around you.”

“I bet you get away with a lot of trouble with that smile.”

“You must be a magician because every time you walk in, everyone else disappears.” (The right character could pull it off I swear)

"I’ve been trying to think of something clever to say, but all my brain can come up with is how much I want to (kiss) you."

"I saw that little glance—you’re not as sneaky as you think."

"How do you manage to make even the most mundane things sound exciting?"

"You do this cute thing with your hands when you’re nervous, you know?"

“One more word, and I might just have to kiss you.”

"Finally, there's that pretty smile of yours. I've been waiting for it all day."

"You keep staring—should I be flattered?" / "Keep looking at me like that and I might start thinking you have a crush on me."

"Do you have any idea how fun it is to watch you try to keep a straight face?"

"I’m pretty sure you could charm the socks off anyone, but I’d like to keep mine on for now."

"If laughter is the best medicine, then I’m pretty sure you’re my favorite doctor."

"Is it bad that I kind of like the way you’re trying to mess with me?"

Looking For More Writing Tips And Tricks? 

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I would also like to introduce the concept of touch ARFID. You finally get out of touch starvation but actually it's only okay if it's like. One person specifically. Perhaps two, or five, but any person not on your safe touch list and you will get nauseous, you will get so revoltingly sick, and you know you have to expand your palate and just "not be bothered" by the occasional shoulder tap of an unsafe touch person because normal people are fine with it why can't you be? but it makes you so violently sick to your stomach and you curl up and do anything to make that touch go away, it wasn't meant to affect you but here you are

It took you so long to get accustomed to each new person you integrated into your safe persons list. It was agonizing at first but it was something you were willing to do because of all you'd been through together, the two of you, and you trust them to the end of the earth, and over time their touch became as dear to you as their presence.

But any of these other "normal" people? Forget it

touch-starvation needs to be written with emphasis on the starving part. you are hungry to be touched. so hungry that even the very taste of it makes you nauseous. it has been long since anything has ever touched you, ever fed you - that your body has grown more used to that gnawing emptiness more than anything else. it's better for you to be held, to eat but it makes you sick to try. you know

Belegarth

ok well it has been real but i am going to kill you with a hammer now

Unrealistic