Something About Husbands In The Kitchen

Mickey, Ian, and Sandy bonding over their gayness?? Jk jk just anything with the three of them lol

“Take a sip or hit if you’ve never fucked around with someone of the same gender,” Sandy says leaning back against the couch in Ian and Mickey’s apartment.

“This feels targeted to the minority here tonight,” Lip says as he reaches for the joint from Mickey and puts down his can of Coke.

“Maybe stop being so straight.” Sandy retorts with a shrug.

Lip takes a hit and then leans forward to pass it to Carl.

Carl shakes his head and that causes an uproar from his older brothers.

“Wait, wait, hold up!” Ian says.

“No fucking way!” Lip laughs, taking another hit.

Carl holds up his hands in defence, “Fuck off,”

Mickey reaches for the joint from Lip and flicks the ash off before inhaling deeply, he holds the smoke in his lungs when he speaks, “So being a queer is just a Gallagher trait then? That’s 3 from 6 siblings.”

“I’m not gay!” Carl says.

“Then tell us what you did.” Sandy says.

Carl sighs, “It’s not that serious, I was at a party one time and I was fucked up and made out with some guy as a dare.”

“Did you like it?” Ian asks.

Carl shrugs and picks at the label on his beer bottle. “Wasn’t a bad kiss.”

Mickey cackles and reaches for Ian’s drink. “Faggot,”

Ian snatches his drink back from Mickey, “Told you to stop fuckin’ saying that shit.”

“I think we can say it, cause we’re gay.” Sandy reasons.

“Yeah! I’m fuckin’–what’s it called, re-owning it?”

“Re-claiming,” Sandy adds.

“Reclaiming! I’m reclaiming it! Congrats on being a faggot, Carl, it’s fuckin’ good shit. Being dicked down is one of the best motherfuckin’ things.”

Ian snorts and pats Mickey’s leg before getting up and walking to the kitchen.

“I’m not gonna fuck a guy!” Carl yells.

“Why not? No one knows what feels good like someone with the same junk,” Sandy says.

Ian walks back in with four beers and one coke, “Junk doesn’t equal gender.” He says.

Sandy holds out her hand for the new beer, “Touché.”

“Carl I’m on your side, you don’t gotta fuck a guy, don’t feel peer pressured by these gays,” Lip says. He crunches his finished Coke can and opens the new one Ian got him.

“Shut up, Phillip. No one asked for your hetero-ass fuckin’ opinion.” Mickey says.

“Lip, I’m gonna ask a question and I want an honest answer,” Sandy says before taking a sip of beer, “Have you ever had anything up your ass?”

“Woah woah woah!” Lip exclaims, “Hold on,”

“Wait no I wanna hear this,” Ian laughs.

“Fuck off,”

“Look it’s not that bad.” Carl says unexpectedly.

“Carl, what the fuck!” Lip says the same time Ian coughs up his drink and Mickey and Sandy start slapping each other in shock.

“My ex, she was into it, look it doesn’t matter, what matters is, you’re the least cultured person here, Lip.”

“Cause I haven’t had something up my ass?”

“Even I’ve had something up my ass!” Sandy says.

“Get with the times, Lip,” Ian says to his brother. He’s got an arm around Mickey’s shoulder and his eyes are bright with the how much he’s smiling.

Mickey raises his brows judgmentally at Lip, “You’ve never let Tami peg you? Pussy.”

Lip looks around the room at everyone in confusion, “I’m not having this fucking conversation. Next question, new round.”

Sandy groans, “Ugh fine. Take a sip or hit if…”

there is NO way 15-16-year-old, radiohead listening (and merch owning), animal bone collecting, cat loving, identity-searching mickey milkovich DIDN’T want to get his ears (or other part of his face) pierced, at least as a fleeting thought. there’s just no way. i’m not accepting other takes!

I love how Mickey fell for little tiny Ian. Like it’s so cute.

To be fair, Ian fell for this:

Both adorable little fetuses that grew up good.

you’re my husband.

Tell me goodbye.

Ian and Mickey + dancing together

Here’s some more fuckin’, you’re welcome, people.

Mickey @ Ian:

if you’re ever losing an argument hit’em with the “you want me.”