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14. Going on a sleigh ride + Zekina please!

zekina + going on a sleigh ride!

“Oh. Lily, maybe we could…not take our mittens off?”

Tina looks to Zeke for help, and he quickly scoops their baby into his arms.

“Hey, now. You gotta listen to your mama, little lady! The mittens stay on.”

Tina doesn’t usually have a problem getting her daughter to behave, but overstimulation is making it difficult to persist with her fair, patient parenting style. The cold weather grips her even through several layers of clothing, and Lily seems intent on doing everything in her power to frazzle her mom.

“Thank you.” Tina sighs. “This is fun. This’ll be fun, right?”

Zeke nods.

“Course it will be. Wasn’t this whole thing your idea, baby?”

That was true, but Tina had pictured the whole thing going a lot more smoothly. Family sleigh rides at the park! Why would that be stressful? As she’s quickly finding out, though, babies often make things more stressful than they need to be. Zeke likes to say that their daughter takes after him, but Tina just hopes Lily doesn’t grow up getting as many detentions as her dad did.

“Right. My idea.” Tina says warily. “Do you think she’ll have fun?”

As a mom, it’s hard not to worry about how well you’re doing. If your kids aren’t happy, intellectually stimulated, and well behaved at all times, you start to feel like a total failure. Miraculously, Lily chooses that moment to grin.

“Well, that answers that!” Zeke says. “See, T? She’s having a blast. So am I!”

Tina’s stress is no match for his upbeat attitude. When leans in to kiss her cheek, she starts to feel better.

“Are you really?” She asks. “Even though our sleigh ride was supposed to start at 4, and the first group isn’t back yet?”

Zeke nods.

“Are you kiddin’ me? It’s a day with my girls! Nothin’ makes me happier than that.”

Before Tina can answer, Zeke smiles at something behind her. He raises a pointer finger in that direction.

“Oh, boy. Look who’s here, T.”

Turning around, Tina gasps softly. The first group of sleigh riders has returned, and their massive sleigh is being led by three large, majestic horses.

“Ah!” Lily giggles.

“The horses!” Tina says, full of childlike wonder.

She’s only seen horses up close a handful of times, but this is a whole new kind of delight. For the first time, she’s seeing her favorite animal through the eyes of her daughter. Sure enough, Lily’s eyes are huge with elation. Zeke chuckles, squeezing his wife’s hand.

“Horses.” He agrees. “Wow. I can’t tell which one of you is more excited! You think you can handle this, Tina girl?”

As she tugs her family in the direction of the sleigh, Tina doesn’t answer. Reinvigorated, she marches through the snow, ready to give her daughter a Christmas memory she won’t forget.

high school timber is all about repression!!!

it's about bernard desperately trying to prove to himself and his parents that he's straight!! because his parents already don't like him and he cannot be gay. not now not ever!!!! so he puts up this front of a ladies man and he picks a girl he cant ever get together with and maybe he kisses like 3/4 of the female population at grieves and gains a reputation but hey! at least he's not gay! but he's so caught up in making sure his eyes don't to stick too long on tyrone's face or michael-from-biology's eyes or kabir-from-study-hall's thick thighs that even his attraction to women is under a filter. and it's not that he doesn't like women, he does! very much so!! but it's that he's soo caught on not being perceived as gay that he cant show his attraction to women the way he'd like to. it's all under this filter of what he thinks Real Men who are attracted to women act like so it's this brash, loud, crass, thing and it's not him at all. it's "ooh tim, ms. winters is soooo hot!" or "hey kayla, why don't you and i get to know each other a little better, if you know what i mean?" or "god her tits are soo big. she's so fucking hot!" and all this other shit when he really means, "tim, why the fuck does your stepmom have such a pretty smile?" or "kayla, you said you liked yugioh? i'd love to hear more about it!" or "god fuck, that girl has such pretty hands. i think if i held them i'd combust." but none of that is how a Real Man likes women so he shuts that shit down before it even has a chance to come up. it's fine, he's fine. so what if no one ever holds him like he holds those girls? it's fine. he'll take the manwhore label and the fuckboy title and he'll give out as many kisses as those girls want and if sometimes when he's kissing a girl he wonders what it'd be like to sit on kabir's thighs or if tyrone's lips really are as soft as they look, that's just the devil speaking. and if sometimes when he walks back into the cafeteria at lunch, lipstick still smudged on the corner of his mouth, after making out with a girl and his eyes skirt over tim's lithe body and he wonders what it'd be like to draw out the same sounds he's heard girls make when he kisses them, or what it'd be like to brush his thumb over tim's hands, or what it'd be like to hold tim or press a kiss to his shoulder, or a million and one other things, well that'll just have to be another one his secrets.

and it's about tim who's in a relationship with stephanie and his dad knows he's robin and he doesn't have time to figure out why his mouth goes dry when the light hits bernard's hair just right. he's too busy trying to figure out a way back to his nightlife. and so what if bernard has pretty pink lips that look very plush? so what if he's looked at some of his teammates and thought they were handsome? he's not blind!!! he has a girlfriend! and he loves her! and so what if his hand brushes bear's during fourth-period bio? so what if the tingles last all day? it was just some static! and it doesn't matter that when bear laughs his eyes get squinty and they water over -- cause bear always laughs so hard he almost cries -- and it sounds like bells. and it doesn't even matter, that sometimes when bernard walks back into the lunchroom, 10 minutes before the bell rings, lipstick smeared across the corner of his mouth, lips tilted up in the most charming smirk he's ever seen, that his chest fills with jealousy. it doesn't matter that his hands clench into fists so hard that his nails leave crescents marks all day. it doesn't matter that he wants to be bear's flavor of the day, week, month, whatever. he wants to leave the lipstick marks!! he wants to know if bear really is as good as he hears the girls speak about!!! he wants to know "that thing bernard does with his tongue!" is! he wants to drape himself over bear the same way he sees those girls do! he wants to know what bear's hands feel like gripping his waist. he wants, wants, wants!!! but it doesn't matter. it doesn't. he's got a girlfriend, her name is stephanie, she's gorgeous and, most importantly he loves her. he's too busy for bernard anyway.