Headcanons Homelander / John Gillman
Lector femenino. (En realidad es neutro, pero seguro se me escapó algún pronombre femenino).
Advertencias : Celos, posesividad, falta de privacidad y dependencia. En general, una relación desgastante.
(Avíseme si falta alguno por incluir).
NO AUTORIZO LA TRADUCCIÓN DE MIS OBRAS.
(Disculpe si existen faltas ortográficas, gramaticales o de redacción, intento mejorar).
Lo llamaré John, el decirle "Homelander" realmente me parece algo raro.
En fin, continuemos.
Existen dos posibilidades con él :
1. Te muestra a todos sus fans.
2. Evita por cualquier medio que tu rostro sea conocido por el mundo.
En la primera opción podríamos referirnos al Homelander de la primera temporada, cuando todavía no existían TANTOS problemas en Vought. Le gustaría presumirle a todo el mundo la gran pareja que tiene.
En la segunda opción nos referimos al Homelander de las últimas temporadas, su reputación de "buen héroe" se está desmoronando para convertirse en un personaje político. Lo que menos quiere es que los periódicos incluyan tu nombre en sus títulos amarillistas.
Aún con ambas opciones, John todavía conserva ciertos rasgos con su pareja, sin especificar la temporada a la que nos referimos.
Muy posesivo, te alejará de cualquier persona que intente pasar demasiado tiempo contigo.
Grandes problemas de celos por parte de él.
No sabe gestionar el rechazo, específicamente TU rechazo. No entiende que hay ocasiones en las que simplemente no puedes darle todo el amor y atención que desea.
Canónicamente es un aficionado a los elogios, así que podemos deducir que cualquier afirmación positiva le será casi curativa.
Al inicio tu relación con él sólo se podría desarrollar el ámbito sexual, se necesitará más tiempo para que John se abra emocionalmente contigo.
Se muestra algo cerrado a hablar con respecto a su infancia. No intentes presionarlo, ya que eso sólo provocará que la relación vuelva a centrarse únicamente en el sexo.
Una vez que John confíe plenamente en ti, será muy demandante. Probablemente te vuelvas la única persona a la que él pueda recurrir en sus malos momentos. (Claro, existe Sister Sage, pero no es lo mismo que contigo).
En realidad es muy suave con su pareja.
Necesita MUCHA validación. Vought lo ha reducido a ser solo un objeto publicitario, hace un buen tiempo desde que realmente "salva" a alguien. Realmente necesita que le reafirmes su valor como héroe.
En cuanto a sus puntos negativos...
Tiene poca o nula disponibilidad para ti. Su "trabajo" acapara todo su tiempo.
Si añadimos la cantidad de periodistas que se aferran a él, realmente existen pocas veces en las que realmente está disponible de la manera que deseas.
Si desarrollamos la opción en que John si te muestra al público, entonces tendrás muchas expectativas por parte del mundo. Con una imagen idealizada de ti, puedes irte acostumbrando al estrés.
Con respecto a lo anterior, tampoco existe la privacidad. En el momento en que tu nombre y "Homelander" estén en la misma línea será la última vez que te encuentres libre de paparazzis.
Los fans tóxicos, ya sabemos que parte de su público es un poco (tal vez demasiado) extremista.
Ahora, considera esto :
Imaginemos una situación en la que te quejas con John debido a la falta de privacidad que tienes, todo ocasionado por sus fans y los paparazzi.
John realmente lo considera un problema menor y lo desestimará, talvez diciendo que exageras la situación.
Lo que John no logra procesar es que, a comparación de él, tú nunca has vivido con la presencia constante del ojo público.
John en ocasiones puede ser un gran idiota. Ténle MUCHA paciencia, la mayoría de las veces no es a propósito.
Toda la situación de ser "héroe" realmente afecta a la empatía de uno, especialmente con su caso particular.
En resumen :
Una relación llena de celos, posesividad, dependencia y sexo.
Si somos más optimistas, podríamos añadir momentos de consuelo, caricias, intimidad, proximidad y confianza en su relación.
Sólo puedo intuir que te gusta la intensidad.
(Todavía me falta mucho por añadir sobre él, aunque no se me ocurre nada nada más en este momento. 😭)
"Homelander es un superhéroe tan malvado, matando personas sin pensarlo"
Literalmente Homelander :
¿Ustedes en serio lo consideran una amenaza?
Sólo es un adulto con fetiches raros.
-The Seven-
Serious:Somewhat single moms-Pt 1- Bolivia flage cape and a black suit .☟ _The boys x reader_
-Homelander- John x black! Fem! reader
Summary: Y/n is South America's number one. Hero is in a group called Patina, and she has been sent on a trip to North America. To meet the Seven for a National But her representative wants her to get close with Homelander.
Waning: bad language, Angst, reader being Sexualize.
Set in: it's the plot so don't come after me if I redo it.
@z3r0art
Seva Airlines is the plane that Y/n and her lower Supes know as patina. We're on to make it to North America to meet the Infamous Seven. Y/n didn't really care all that much she had her representative Steve up her ass about this opportunity.
For three months. The persistent Bitch really pushed that it would help with her look as a Hero and get her more Points.
Y/n was somewhat like Homelander, just female. She was just better at pretending to smile waving. But she hated having to smile all the time. It was exhausted. Her smiled and would always fade after the currents fell. Like she had ever smiled ones.
Now her was going to meet the men of America and his side show. She was only somewhat happy to meet Starlight. A new hero So much potential That made fire strom have a little bit more hopeful in the world.
Steve had told Y/n that Vought wanted to have a National Superhero Appreciation. Or Nsh, the plane soon landed on top of the vot building y/n slow stood up and walked out the plane with a small smile. To keep up her illusion of being happy, she could see Ms. Madelyn Stillwell and she big white women smile on her face.
" Patina. The heroes of South America welcome to Vot I'm Madelyn Stillwell." She says,"Were glad to be here." Y/n says as Madelyn walks them into the blinding. She slowly.
and fucking your Secretary kind. " This with be your freedom room. Basically, what im saying is that you can do whatever in here." She smiles she walks out.
Y/n sits down at the head of the table with a smile that makes everyone tense up. " Sit down." She says, and they all slowly sit down.
" So does everyone have something to say. Questions, concerns?" Y/n says," Why the hell are we here? I know that's what we're all thinking." BB says
-BB- Ballon boy. -Jimmy Hall - power: immoral.
" That is a good question. we are here for National super hero day." Y/n says," What the hell does that mean?" BB says," we walk around a bit, help the seven if needed, and just breathe air." Y/n says. Everyone looks at each other, and they agree on how easy it is. " Oh, and hear are your keys." Y/n throws five keys out to her team. " For what?" BB says," Your rooms." Y/n says in a soft tone. " There on the fifth floor." She smiles." Now, all of you go." Y/n says in a cold tone. They all sigh and whisper to themselves about how dumb this was. Y/n slowly turned her head to the side. " BB, what do you want?" She sees him sitting on the table." What ya thinking about, doll?" He says " How to quit." She says.
" You could just retire." He says. With a smile," You and me both know what that means. I go into some cold old room little nowhere to be tested on." He nods." You can start a family. That's what Liya did, and I still see her." He says,
" Maybe. "
•┈┈┈••✦ 🔥 ✦••┈┈┈•
Y/n leaves the room and walks over to the elevators and waits for it where she hears someone walking over to her and the elevators. She looks over to see Homelander walking over to the elevators. " shit." She whispers. Homelander walked up to the elevators, and they opened. "Excuse me." He says y/n looks back." Oh, sorry." She smiles he walks in first.
Homelander slowly looked down at y/n and her outfit. The boob window and her Bolivia flag on her back. Her black suit on her skin was tight and small, mostly around her back side. " Nice ass." He said with a smirk with a look of contempt as he looked at her.
The ends of y/n's hair are set on fire, her hair Indulgeinng in the red flames. " Thanks, I guess. " y/n was creeped out and taken a back. How could he see her ass? He looked at the fire at the end of her hair and then back at her, "No problem." He says."So. Why are you here?" He asks her.
" National super hero's Appreciation Month." She says," So you're a part of Patina?" He asked." Actually, I'm the leader of Patina." She says," Well, it's always nice to have younger heroes as leaders. " y/n chuckles. He was trying to butter her up. He turned his head back to he and then smirke. "So. You can control fire?" " Yes." She says." So. You're like the strongest superhero in South America." He asked her, and he wanted to know everything about her." You could say that." She was trying to keep dry a conversation.
Homelander thought for a second before speaking, "I'm surprised I know of the group Patina. You know most people can't name a single group from South America." He says in a sarcastic manner. As if South America was beneath him, "But I guess you didn't tell me your name?"
Y/n give him a what the fuck look trying to overlook how disrespectful that was. " My real name?" She says,"Yeah, your real name?" He said in an annoyed fashion, waiting for her answer. " y/n no last name. " She says," That's interesting. " he says Try the sound disinterested. "I'm curious. How much is Patina respected in South America?" He said, wanting to see if her pride was big like Homelander's " as much as the seven is in the States." She says.
"Oh, I see. So Patina's just as big down south as we are up here in the States. Is that what you're saying?" He said, trying to gauge y/n to see if she had a big ego" yeah." The elevator stops, and she walks out. Homelander follows y/n and catches up to her. "So. Let me guess, y/n ." He said, walking up next to her."You just happen to have the most beautiful ass in all of South America." He said, wanting to see her reaction to that.
" I thought you dropped that conversation." Y/n says, walking past Madelyn Stillwell's Office.Homelander chuckled and shook his head."Come on, y/n. Who doesn't love talking about a beautiful ass. Especially one like yours. I mean, look at that peach." He said, touching her ass over her suit, smiling while he does it.
She grabs his hand, her eyes turning eye. " Don't touch me." Y/n says her hand, burning his suit arm slightly.
"Aww. Come on, y/n, don't be like that. My hands just so happened to wander over there. Don't be so uptight." He said in a sarcastic manner, keeping his hand on her ass " Oh well, my hand wandered to your face." She slaps him.
He stood in shock as he rubbed his cheek with his free hand. He couldn't believe she had done that. But then he took a deep breath and regained his composure and took his hand off her ass. "What the hell?" He screamed at her."How dare you lay a hand on Homelander. I am the most powerful superhero in the god damn world." He yelled in a scary, intimidating tone at her." Do I really give a shit?" She thinks," Oh, I don't."
Homelander took a second to process what she told him, and then he got angry again. "I am The Homelander. You show some respect. "He yelled at her in anger. He wanted her to beg for his mercy. He wanted to scare her, but she wasn't showing fear. It was pissing Homelander off.
" Oh, stop it, you're just as broken and damaged as everyone else." Earlier that day, y/n Looked at John's File or his life story on a paper.
Homelander grew very angry as he took another step closer to y/n. He was now in her face with the heat of his breath hitting her lips. He looked down at her and took another angry breath. "I am a god compared to everyone else, and you should respect me." He yelled at her with no fear of what she would say in return. He was the most powerful being in existence, and she would not cross him.
Homelander didn't seem to notice the haft Chub he was getting. Was he fucking turned on? " Well, I guess.''god'' has a boner." She pointed out his pants.
That caught Homelander off guard, and as he looked down at his pants, there was indeed a boner starting to show through his pants. "What the..." He began to stammer, looking at y/n. Her face was still, and she didn't give any response."That's normal." He says, trying to change the subject to something less awkward.
" it shouldn't be. You shouldn't get a boner when you yell at me." She was speaking Facts.
He cleared his throat before saying, "Hey, it's common for a man to get a boner when a hot woman is standing in front of him." The words come flying out of his mouth quickly as he realizes he just said what was on his mind."You're hot." He said awkwardly.
That was out of character. " And you got that from yelling at me?" She says. "No, I mean... I just look at you, and it happens." He says with a smirk, he was enjoying talking to y/n, she was the first woman to actually talk back to him. And it made him want to keep talking to her. Something he wasn't used to, he was attracted to y/n, and he knew it.
She rolled her eyes and walked away."Wait! Y/n, where are you going? Don't go, I want to keep talking to you." He yelled after her, not wanting her to leave just yet. She just continued walking.
"Damn it." He said to himself, he was actually enjoying talking to y/n, and she had to ruin the moment for him by walking away."Well, I hope you have a nice night. And by the way. You do have a nice ass." He yelled out to y/n as she walked. "Nice and fat." He whispered to himself as he watched her leave.
A/n: I'm so happy. 😁 thank you for your support. Love you guys.😘😘
Next pt:
-𝐇𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫- 𝐉𝐨𝐡𝐧 𝐱 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲 𝐦𝐨𝐦 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 - NOT A CHAPTER-
ᴡᴀɴɪɴɢ: 𝐀𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭, 𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭, 𝐛𝐚𝐝 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬, 𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡, 𝐫𝐚𝐩𝐞, 𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐠,𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐝.
𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: Homelander meets a woman named Y/n Jackson and ends up having three babies with her. Then, two years later, Y/n files for divorce on domestic violet terms. Will their problems affect their children? Or will they do what every parent wants for them to be better.
Q&A
First part: Set in 2001.
second part: set i 2013
Third part: Set in 2015.
Fourth part: Set in 2019.
hello,my name's emile! how may i take your order? please pick your fandom and take a look at the menu below and tell me what you'd like!
(don't see something you like? ask anyways and i'll do it within reason or add it to the menu in the future :3)
────── .✦
- call of duty
- elden ring
- the boys
- dc
- marvel
- certain anime/manga (just ask!)
-tf2
-rdr2
-bg3
-arcane
-dbh
-hannibal
────── .✦
- cappuccino: "Please let me help you."
- latte: "Not in this lifetime."
- frappuccino: "Can we skip the fight this time, please?"
- mocha: "Sorry for waking you up, go back to sleep."
- americano: (other chara talking to chosen character) "You're in love with her/him/them, aren't you?"
- doppio: "It's 3 in the morning, what're you doing here?"
- macchiato: "You said you liked it, so I got it for you."
- ristretto: "Everyone already thinks we're dating."
- affogato: "You're dangerous."
- oolong tea: "I've wanted to ask you for a while now, but I didn't know how."
- chai: "Wanna go get a drink?"
- chamomile tea: "No, I'm not jealous"
- cheesecake: enemies to lovers
- chocolate cake: forced proximity
- apple pie: friends to lovers
- chocolate chip cookie: fluff
-shortbread cookie: angst
- not in stock: (senders request for a specific trope)
- on the house: writers choice!
────── .✦
- espresso martini: "I've met strays who are more obedient than you."
- irish coffee: "Fuck, that's a good girl."
- mudslide: "You gonna beg f'me?"
-prairie buzz: "Use your teeth."
- tequila espresso: "I didn't think you'd be so responsive."
- kirsch au café: "God- Do that again."
- italian espresso: "Try to stay quiet, understand?"
- black forest gateau: cockwarming
-chocolate macaron: rough sex
- vanilla macaron: gentle sex
- matcha gateau: age gap
- tiramisu: oral sex (specify which side)
- chocolate cherry cake: sugar daddy
-lemon cheesecake: body worship (specify which side)
+ His first time seeing you. Actually, he's seen you in his peripheral a handful of times. This? This is when he gets a good, long, look at you. He's a little stuck to say the least.
Words: 657 (Short & sweet, I just couldn't help making a point.)
A/N: Oh how I LOVE down bad man. You can't watch the show and not know that whoever has his affection HAS him. This is my first fic on this blog, I've written a lot before, deleted my blog, and came back, Maybe this will bring me back in, who knows. (Ask box open).
Warnings: Cursing, Homelander craving you, a little too wanting.
+ + +
Homelander likes you. No, listen, Homelander likes you. These days he’s so brazen with it, and you can hardly walk into the same room as him without buzzing under his stare. However, I wanna start it off a little slow at least. He started it off slow at least. Kind of.
It’s your third week in when he takes a good look at you. A rushed mission brief is called and Ashley, idiot, decides now is the time to try out a new presentation method. Handouts. She’s so fucking proud of herself when she steps to the front of the room and says, “I want to ensure everyone has a thorough analysis of the plan, as well as some facts about the landscape that I think—“
Oh please, he’s so close to asking her if she was shaken as an infant when he notices you. Supe by supe you walk around, placing a sheet of paper in front of everyone, & God the sight of you. You know how hard it is for someone to catch him off guard? You do it instantly, unknowingly, unabashedly. Honestly, it’s your eyes – wait – your lips. He can’t stop looking at your lips. Then you smile at The Deep and he has to sit back in his seat a little bit, scooch down, and lean over, chin in hand just to get a good look at you. You’re just about to reach Noir when Ashley musters up the gumption to ask, “Homelander, how would you feel about starlight leading this mission while you stay as backup?”
He’s almost too slow to take his eyes off you, but he does & laughs incredulously at Ashley. “Why would I do that?”
She actually quick steps towards him, hand extended holding a sheet of paper, & places it in front of him before you can make it. “We’re working to establish your image with our female audience, ages 25 through 45, as a softer protector.” She says softer with a wince, like she can hear how fucked it sounds. He’s annoyed, and has to deep breathe his way out of showing it. What the fuck is he reading? It's a mess of statistics and a – quite honestly –l ameass excuse for a game plan that he’s happy to pass on to StarLight. Ashley finishes with “Currently you’re doing amazing with our male audience, but we’d like to shift towards a team player, lover of women image.”
He’s a lover. Through and through, and sometimes hard to find. It’s there though, eventually you’ll get it.
You walk behind him, and reach beside him to place a sheet down in front of Queen Mauve. You smell good. He tilts his head just enough to catch a sight of you without being too honest about it. You’re a sight. You know that? It’s enough to make his eyes drag down your body, stopping at your ass and then making a slow track down your legs. He’s a dog about it, and internally says fuck it, because then his eyes are back up and locked on yours.
He hears your heart jump a little, but you’re a pro, because you just smile it off —fuck, you’re beautiful — and say “Good morning.” Before walking away.
Fuck off, ‘Good morning’ , he’s salivating.
“Good morning” he says kindly.
He hasn’t been this turned on, this quickly in a long time. For a human at that? You’re a new feeling, one he can’t even tell if he’s comfortable with. So he’s gotta lock his eyes back on Ashley and pretend like he isn’t gonna think about you later. “Yeah, absolutely –” He waves his hand, & smiles, “– let’s show some girl power, huh?”
One last glance at you, and you’re looking right at him. He doesn’t even hide his stares this time. His dick jumps a little at the fact that you don’t look away, and he makes a mental note to get your name after this.
+++
A/N: *Screams in wanting him*
positions
cw: nsfw, gn.reader, some size kink
includes: homelander, butcher, frenchie, black noir, hughie, solider boy, MM
Homelander - likes when you’re on top. Don’t get it wrong he still has control but, he likes watching how you pant and struggle to take him all. Besides he gets a nice view of your chest while he bounces you on his cock. Absolutely bucks up into you to see how you squeal and grip his shoulders. He also likes it because he doesn’t have to do much work, he’s a supe and works hard ya know?
Black Noir - ass man. Loves doggy style the most. Grips the fat of your ass while he just plows into you. Smoothes his hand on your hips to bring you down on him over and over. Lives to see how you flutter and clench around him. Will push your face into the sheets and leave bruises on your ass.
Butcher - reverse cowgirl all the way. Another ass man who likes to watch you take his cock. You just look so good this way, and he likes how you lean forward to grab at his thighs. Smokes while he fucks you, puffing out while he spreads you open so he can watch how you take him. Makes comments on how slutty you are.
MM - missionary. The classic choice but he loves it. Props himself on his elbows so he can watch your face while he pounds into you. He likes to tuck his face into your neck, nipping it and making you squirm from his beard on your skin. Sometimes gets so into it he’ll lift up your legs onto his shoulders to reach deeper.
Soldier boy - mating press?!? Mating press all the way. Folds you up and stuffs you full, can go for hours. Ben just pushes your legs up and gives you deep strokes that make you starry-eyed and and breathless. He gets so deep you push his chest and he just mocks you from above. Thanks to the V he’s got endless stamina and besides, he hasn’t been able to pump someone full in decades so good luck.
Frenchie - y’all already know this man likes to be dommed. He’s down for absolutely anything and everything. Doesn’t matter if you’re holding his wrists while you fuck yourself with his cock or if you’re fucking him. He practically loves every positions, but he does enjoy 69 a lot.
Hughie - sweet sweet boy likes when he’s tucked behind you. Its so nice because your thighs are clenched together and it’s makes you tighter. The fucks lazy and soft and he just tucks your underwear to the side so he can slip in. You’re clawing at the mattress while he just does slow thrusts. He’ll kiss the back of your neck while he holds you.
me explaining my house of the dragon x the boys x supernatural crossover dream that keeps repeating
ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ AMERICAS SWEET-TARDs
ᯓ★ Homelander is forced to babysit you, the troublemaker of The Seven. Deadpool!reader does not like cooperating, dark humour, goofy stuff, typical cursing, gore, story is set on season 4. Reader is gn (uses they/them pronouns)!!
ᯓ★
How you found yourself in Vought's office is hard to explain. One thing you were bursting into the building of Amazon and the second you're here. You sat on the sofa, looking around as you whistled a tune to save yourself from the boredom.
"Why the fuck am I involved with this?" Your eyes perked up at the distant voices from outside the door.
"I'll explain when we're there"
Oh?
Being the nosy person you are, you got up and pressed the side of your ear against the door to get a better hearing of the conversation.
"Your plan won't come together if you don't settle the pieces in place, and this is your plan so you need to work with me here"
Suddenly it's quiet...
Did they leave?
Before you could react, the door opens and you ended up falling flat on your face. You tilt your head up to see it's Sister Sage and Homelander looking down at you. You chuckle.
"Sooo... you both look angry... did I do something?"
Hearing your question, Sister Sage scoffs at you.
"Did you?? You broke into Amazon's headquarters because they messed up your order. You even threatened to kill their CEO. Do you know how bad that is for the image?"
"I refuse to refer to a person named Jeff Bezo a CEO" You said when you got on your feet while dusting off your knees.
"Besides, I don't have an image. I'm pretty sure that I don't even have a face!!" Hearing your words, Sister Sage can't help but roll her eyes at you.
"Nonono seriously, I do not have a face. All this underneath the mask? It's like smashed up birthday cakes in there—"
"Okay I get it!!" She glares at you... then turning her attention to Homelander who's been listening attentively with his hands behind his back.
"You're babysitting Deadpool" She commanded like an order and he turns to look at her with his brows slightly raised.
"Me?" He said, clearly from his face he looks like he's about to be ticked off.
"Yes, I don't know what is it about them that makes it so hard for me to predict their moves" Just as she said that, she turns to look at you. You bat your eyes at her like a deer caught in headlights.
"Not to mention you're making a shit tons of problems for me to deal with here. You even had Lily be sent for therapy!!" She points at you and you held both your hands up in defeat by the mention of your agent.
"Hey now... All I did was cut off my arm and mailed it to Elon Musk. How else was I gonna give him the middle finger?" Your defense being enough to have her let out a sigh as she looks away.
"I don't care, just don't let them do anything stupid while I go help Firecracker with her script" She said to him and you both watches as she leaves. Once she's gone, he turns to look at you, a displeased expression on his face.
To your surprise, he was really actually TOTALLY doing what she's asking him to. You never saw him take orders like that before, let alone from a WOMAN.
"What was that?!" You exclaimed, both arms thrown towards the hallway where Sister Sage is seen to be walking down.
"What happened to Misogyny?! You're really just gonna let that happen???" You looked at him but he just rolls his eyes at you.
"Shut up. She's done more than you've ever did compared to your years here" He walks past you and ends up sitting down on the sofa. You don't say anything while you watch him go.
You're aware that your inability to die makes him bored of you but you didn't think he'd find you this boring.
Honestly it kinda hurts...
Because now you're gonna have to do more crazy shit to piss him off.
You cleared your throat as you forced up a smile.
"You know what, great talk. I'm gonna go be a good citizen now—"
"You step one foot out of this room and I'll lazer off two of your fucking legs"
"..."
With no idea how to respond to the threat. You stood at the door, looking down at your legs then back up at him... before taking a wide step out of the room.
He let's out an annoyed groan.
"Look I don't see why all of a sudden, you two, give the slightest shit about what I do. Has it ever occurred to you that this is my coping mechanism after YOU SLAUGHTERED NOIR—"
"Oh for christ sake, cry me a fucking river"
"You sure you really want that? 'Cause trust me I can cry the entire Nile river in this very room— and I can't promise you it'll be water" He looks at you and you look back at him, your body still standing a few feet away from the room.
"You done whining?" He asks, his expression showing not even the least of interest in your act. You let out an offended sound.
"Am I done whining?! Do you even know me?? That's LITERALLY all I do!!"
Clearly feeling hurt, you began to storm off. From the distant you could hear Homelander let out an exhausted sigh but you could care less right now.
Man if only you could go back to the first day where you two met.
Oh how traumatised he looked when he saw you cut your ears off in an attempt to escape Stillwell's welcoming speech.
Once you made it to the ground floor, you kicked the entrance door open with your chest slightly puffed out.
Who the hell does Ms. Know-It-All thinks she is to have any authority over you? You're the original member of The Seven for fuck sake.
"Holy shit it's Deadpool!!" A fan, seemingly a teenager points at you and you turned towards their group with your most charming smile.
"Hey now, try not to cream your pants... if you've even reached that stage yet..." Without even letting a second pass, the group stands around you as the one at the front takes out their phone for a selfie.
"Say Chimichangas!!" You said, holding up peace signs.
"Chimichangas!!"
Once the picture is taken, the fans are quick to check the results while you scratched the itch on your butt. Once satisfied, they gave you their thanks before walking away.
At the same time you could hear the sound of Homelander approaching you from behind. You let out an annoyed groan before turning to face him but before you could even react, he grabs you roughly by the jaw.
"Years of your shit and you still won't learn your fucking place. If I say something. You do it. Understand?" He glares at you, his teeth gritted as his lips formed his signature psychotic grin.
You stare back and you could feel from his grip that you were being slightly lifted off the ground.
"Well excuse me, my liege. I must have missed the memo about being your personal slave. Is it too late to withdraw my contract?" He stares at you... before letting go of you while looking away out of despise.
"You're a cancer on this earth" He said as he's busy wiping his glove clean on his chest. You simply laugh at his remark.
"AH HAHaa hoo... well... you can always count on me to pop up unannounced" You shoot him a wink and decided to walk away, not really caring much of the consequences if you did.
Seeing you walk away like he's nothing, Homelander clenches his jaw out of irritation.
"You're always testing my patience (Y/N)" He said and you instantly stopped walking when you hear him addressing you by your real name.
"Uuugggh seriously? You ran out of tricks so now you're using my government name? You've gone old, John" You fold your arms as you turned to face him.
Noticing the angry look on his face, you are almost not surprised with what happens next.
You look down, realising you've been lasered in half. Sounds of people nearby screaming was like background noise for you because you were too focused watching your upper half slide off your lower half... then eventually falling to the ground. You grunt from how annoying the situation has become.
"Ah great... now I'm half the person I used to be..." You partially joked as Homelander picked you effortlessly off the ground before taking you back into the Vought Tower.
"Can you at least tell me why you're taking away my rights as a republican?" You asked with your upper half being carried over his shoulder.
"You don't matter enough to know" He says.
After shooting several finger guns at the horrified employees passing by, you made it back to the office where all of your problems began. You yelp when Homelander just threw your body parts on the sofa, you turn to face him after your efforts to have yourself sit up straight.
"Jeez, you're about as exciting as a stale piece of bread" You said and he takes the sofa in front of you. For a couple of seconds he doesn't say anything but watch you with a stoic expression.
You interrupt the silence with a cough.
Then it's silent again.
.....
Okay this is too boring.
"Could you laser me again for entertainment—? Since you're such a buzz kill it can't be hard" You asked but he stays quiet, not saying anything to add fuel to your fire of words.
Once you realise what he's doing, you let out a long groan.
"Where's my Katana? I might as well just kill myse—"
"How are you not worried about all of this?" He interrupts you and your body freezes in place just as you're about to reach for your weapons.
"How is it that everyone's going through a fucking crisis and you're just... jacking off and watching Netflix series like somebody's drunk unc" He stares at you, slight glimpse of envy shown in his eyes. You scoff out of disbelief before laughing and wheezing uncontrollably.
"Well, unlike some people— UHMUHMyouUHMUHM , I happen to know how to unwind and have fun. Maybe you should try it sometime. Might loosen that stick up your ass" You shoot him a smile and you could feel your powers growing back the bottom half of your body.
He snarls at you.
"I'm the Homelander. I'm the strongest being ever. I don't have time to unwind"
"I don't know man what kind of strongest being brags about being the strongest?" You said with your back pressed against the cushion of the sofa, your hand just casually toying with your dagger.
"DON'T YOU—"
Just as he stands up to shout at you with his eyes now glowing red, the door to the office opens and you both turn to see it's Sister Sage. She looks at you, somewhat an unsurprised reaction to your torn off body parts.
"Great, at least you're not off running to harass another important client of ours"
"Are we done?" Homelander stands near her, clearly fed up with the time he's spent with you so far.
You groan but this time purposely making it known to everyone in the room.
"Great, now there's two people pinning against me. You know... it wouldn't hurt to tell me what your plan is. Maybe I can help!" You said, putting up your most charming smile.
Sister Sage stares at you... more like judging you but then she had a look of epiphany.
"Actually... hearing you say that... you could be useful... if we can get you to start a hate campaign towards the Starlighters. This could make my part with Firecracker so much easier. And besides! Incels LOVE you. You've practically obtained the based persona. You're the perfect mascot" She said, her eyes sparkling as she's clearly brainstorming now.
Homelander stands there, a plastic grin on his face while he has both his fists placed on his hips.
"What?" He says, his eery grin still on his face. You laugh as you crossed your... baby legs?
"You hear that Johnny? People LOOOVEEE me..." You bragged which instantly ticked him off
"Listen up, you walking STD. The ONLY thing that people love about you is your annoying, obnoxious, unfunny fuck of thinking you're gods gift to comedy"
"Well I did make that comedy christmas movie with Maeve. Rest in peace that poor soul, it's like I can still hear her in my nightmares" You said while pretending to wipe away a tear. He rolls his eyes at you and Sister Sage watches in almost amusement.
Her slight smile making Homelander whip his attention to her immediately.
"Are you fucking enjoying this right now?" He glares and she quickly covers it up with a serious look.
"I'll go prepare the venue" She simply said before walking away. You laugh as you notice Homelander still having that angry look on his face when watching Sister Sage walk away.
"Do you need a snickers little kid? You're not you when you're hunrgy"
....
"You just had to push my fucking buttons" He said, the red glow in his eyes dimming after lasering a hole through your head. He stares at your corpse that was still for a moment before you flipped him off with both hands.
He rolls his eyes with a defeated sigh before walking out the office.
[The Next Day]
"GOOD MORNING AMERICA!! IT IS ME!! YOUR FAVOURITE SUPERHEROOOOO!!" The crowd goes wild as you make your appearance on stage. Your mic in hand and the other waving at the crowd.
Homelander who's also present at the campaign, watches from the backstage with a stoic expression.
"Now now now! I have been gathered here to talk about the Starlighters! Huh! Yeah?!" You began to shoot finger guns at the crowd when they started booing at the mention of the Starlighters.
"I know!! Terrible people!! Boooo!! Tomato tomato" You chuckled as you walk across the stage.
"I mean how could you cancel the one and only Homelander? He literally has the personality of a wet sock. Dude already has his own demons to battle!! As a matter of fact, what kind of person goes after a father?! It's not our fault your daddy left you Starlight!!" The crowd cheers at your words.
You turn to give Homelander a thumbs up but he just looks at you with an unimpressed look.
The moment your turn of the campaign was over and it was time for Firecracker to do her thing, you happily skipped on your feet to your next destination... but you were soon stopped when you saw Homelander standing in your way. Though it didn't seem to affect at all.
"You should stop frowning if you don't want your face to look like a nut sack" You pat him on the shoulder before walking past him. With your back turned to him, he couldn't help but touch his forehead a bit... then hurrying to catch up to you.
"Where are you going now?"
"Somewhere full of fun that's for sure" You turn the corner and walked a few more before making to your favourite shop.
You stand in front of it while he stands beside you, his expression unreadable.
"A... pet shop?" He was confused but you didn't bother to answer his confusion and decided to just head on in.
He shakes his head out of frustration before entering the place. He's completely frozen in place when he sees you already surrounding yourself with dogs. You laugh almost maniacally as you enjoyed the way the dogs were licking you so joyfully. That was until you notice the way Homelander is staring at you, scorned by your behaviour.
"What? You upset not even dogs love you? God I'm pretty sure not even flies want to come near you" You joked but his attention on you is pulled away when a dog began gnawing at his glove.
He scowls as he decides to move his hand out of the way but the dog ends up jumping on him to try to chew on the glove as if thinking it's a chew toy.
"Nonono— shoo! Go!" He said while sound of your laughter can be heard in the background.
Oh boy...
[The Next Next Day]
How you scored yourself an invite to the Met Gala was unbelievable. But since you were going, Homelander was left with no choice but to accompany you. As you'd expected it, he showed up in his suit. He really doesn't care about this stupid gathering when he has better things to do.
Better things than supervising your ass.
"Make waaaay for your majesty!!" You said loud enough to make your grand entrance known. Cameras all panning towards you in order to take pictures of your outfit.
You were definitely still wearing your iconic red suit but you had worn a sarape over it. As well as a sombrero and the fake moustache to finish the look. And don't forget the guitar now!! Literally nobody knows why you always do shit like this. The theme is literally 'The Garden Of Time'.
"BOOO!!! FUCK YOU DEADPOOL!! YOU'RE A MENACE TO SOCIETY!!" A starlighter said amongst the rest of the protestors. They must have shown up when they heard news of you and Homelander's appearance. You laughed as you waved your hand dismissively at them.
"Oh, come on, don't be so grumpy. I didn't ask to be born this awesome" You said when walking past their group with Homelander following behind you, both hands placed behind his back like he's your bodyguard.
[The Next Next Next Day]
Of course you'd get yourself arrested for doing some crazy shit during the after party. You whine to yourself as you were chained up in the cell. After all you're no regular prisoner but a supe, so they had to treat you like a monster.
Suddenly two armed guards approached your cell, you stared at the cold faces on their faces before inspecting your restraints.
"You know, I always wanted to try bondage, but I didn't think it would be with such an unenthusiastic audience" You said and soon one of them opened the cell to release you from your imprisonment.
You let out a satisfied grunt as you rubbed both of your sore wrists. Just as the two guards left, Homelander came into view. With the annoyed look on his face, you had expected him to at least be happy to see you.
"Why the long face?" You asked when exiting your cell.
"You caused a raid at the after party. What word of do not cause trouble do you not understand?"
"Ahh you people confuse me. Oh Deadpool please rile up the Starlighters! No Deadpool don't punch the Starlighter for spilling your drink on you! Pick a side goddamn it!" You said changing your voice each time when imitating a person.
Homelander rolls his eyes at your attitude.
"I can't wait for this to be over with" Homelander murmured and began walking away. You didn't wait for a second to pass before chasing after him.
"Hey now! I'm literally your only friend left! Maeve got blown into Christmas dust, Noir became jello, The Deep... eh... he's still pretty balls deep inside an octopus, A-Train is busy being in his redemption arc. And Starlight? To be honest I never considered her apart of our friend group" You whispered the last part as though you were gossiping, which you were in the case.
"Lucky me" Homelander said in the most monotone voice it was hard not to miss the absent of emotions in his eyes.
"You're welcome bestie!! #2 bestie though because I've just became friends with Espresso lady last night" You said and quickly took your stuff back from the officer to show the picture of you and Sabrina Carpenter on your phone.
"Ugh..." Clearly not interested, Homelander left you behind but you could care less as you ended up bragging it to the poor police officer just trying to do his job.
[The Next Next Next Next Next Day]
Of course you're a supe so 99% of your job is to have fun while the 1% of your job is saving lives. You laughed as you fought with the group of thieves inside the crowded casino. A feet away stood, you guessed it, Homelander watching with his arms crossed. It looked more like he wanted this to be over with than be concerned for the safety of the civilians.
"Man this place looks great! How did I never knew of this part of the city?" You said looking around the interior design after effortlessly dodging the man's knife which you simply twisted in his hands to stab it right through his chest.
"Can you get away? I'm trying to win here" An old granny spoke when pushing the dead corspe off the gambling machine.
"Oooo... what's this?" Your eyes went wide in awe as you watched her repetitively tap on the button. Years of your life and you never thought of such a divine invention.
"FUCK YOU!!" A thief jumped off a table and onto your back, his knife in hand as he continously stabbed you on the chest.
"Why is it always the bad guys with the lousy gambling habits? Seriously, I could be playing poker right now, and instead, I'm stuck here whooping your asses" You whipped out your gun and shot the man in the face, his grip on you loosening as he falls to the ground.
Clearly knowing they have no chance in winning, they quickly ran but you simply shot each of them from the back until the very last one. With the dead bodies splattered across the casino floor, you spin your pistol around to blow the hot smoke from it.
"They don't call me Deadpool for nothing. Get it? Cause' Dead... pooool" You laughed when motioning at the pool of dead bodies on the ground that some of the bystanders watching and hiding were scared of what to do at the moment.
They also don't call you the insane member of The Seven for nothing.
[The Next Next Next Next Next Next Day]
You yawned with your back pressed on the sofa while Homelander was pretty much glaring daggers down at you. That's because you decided to make yourself feel homey in his room. With how good the leather felt— how could you not?
"Hey Ryan!" You waved at Ryan who awkwardly stops at the mention of his name.
"Hey..." He waves back at you with a nervous smile before hurrying up the stairs.
Even with Homelander pretty much wanting to kill you right now, you still had the mood to stretch all over his sofa. You grunt at the bliss of the feeling. The feeling of relaxation.
"Maaaan! I haven't gotten to rest for the past few days. Makes me wish I was born a rock"
"Why are you even in my room?" He asks, his voice so piercing.
"Eh... Ever head of a sleepover? Don't you wanna put on face masks together and do each other's nails? We ARE besties aren't we? #2 bestie though since Espresso lady—"
"Enough! GET OUT!!" Suddenly he lifts you up and threw you out the window. Ignoring the sounds of screaming and car alarm blaring, he sat down on the sofa with his eyes closed.
Finally... some peace...
[The Next Next Next Next Next Next Next Last Day]
With the responsibility of needing to follow you around to make sure you didn't intervene with Sister Sage's plan, he was starting to lose his sanity, or what's left of it. He sits in his chair with the rest of the members. Apparently you had called for a meeting and you had to specify that it was an important one. About what? Nobody knows.
"Where is Deadpool?" Firecracker asked since everyone had been waiting for almost an hour now. But just as she said that, you arrived, multiple puppies in your arms.
"Hellooooo! Thank you for waiting for me!! I had to drop by the pet shop to adopt these little devils" You said as you handed one to each of them.
"Ooh puppies!" Black Noir said happily when accepting one from you.
"Can you hurry up?" Sister Sage spoke up with the puppy in her hand playfully biting her fingers.
"Yeah yeah don't rush me, don't you know how to respect your elders?" You stood at the center in front of them. Before starting you made sure to clear your throat very thoroughly. All expected you to be serious about what you had to say but suddenly you balled your fists together with your effort of making puppy dog eyes.
"Pleasepleaseplease let me have my freedom back!! I swear I'll be good!!" You begged and Homelander practically stared at you while not giving much care of the puppy gnawing at his glove.
"You know you wouldn't be in this mess if you hadn't been constantly breaking all the ties we have with other companies!! Do you know how helpful it could have been if you didn't pull that stunt at the met gala's after party?" Sister Sage said, expressing her frustration towards you but you waved her off dismissively.
"Okay but seriously guys, I appreciate the whole 'let's babysit Deadpool since they're a walking disaster' routine, but it's getting a bit old. I mean, come on, I've been doing the whole vigilante thing for a while now and nobody ever had a problem with it! I was even the host for MTV 2020!!"
"Which they banned you after because you exposed every celebrity there!"
"Not my fault that Ryan Reynolds had a thing for me"
You sighed.
"I'm starting to think you hate me Sage"
"Oh wow I wonder why"
"Nonono it's because I'm so smart that you can't even predict my next moves!!"
"Or maybe, you make the dumbest decisions that even I can't predict them!!"
"Oh please! I'm the Picasso of poor decisions! It's an art form! The only thing predictable is my ability to be unpredictably unpredictable"
Suddenly all attention turned to Homelander the second he let out an annoyed sound.
"... you know what? Fine. Go do your own thing. Bother someone else who gives a shit" He said waving you off and you jumped happily in the air. At the same time, Sister Sage looked at him in disbelief.
"You know they're gonna get in the way of our plans right?"
"Do you wanna babysit them?" He asks which made her stay quiet and simply lean back into her chair.
All of them watched as you happily skipped your way out of the meeting room. As expected, for the next few days you created more problems for everyone to deal with, first you created a line of Deadpool-themed lingerie which the manufacturing had to be shut down because the company you worked with were selling it using fake products, it was so bad that it had influencers calling you out for it.
Then there was the thing where you hired a bunch of hackers to loop baby shark on every TV in America. That nearly got you arrested but Vought being Vought, they managed to bail you out. If it didn't get worse, you also went ahead spraying neon red on the Statue of Liberty and for some reason replaced all billboards with ads featuring a fake upcoming movie called "Deadpool: The Musical".
During those same days, you were away most of the time so when you came back to Vought to find Homelander in his wrecked up room. You decided to sit down beside him on the floor. Everything was destroyed, even the TV screen was smashed but yet it was still playing. You could care less on why he did it. All you cared about was your hungry stomach right now.
"Chimichangas?" You said, offering him one. He looks at you with a blank expression... before taking one and eating it himself.
Eventually you two enjoyed the food peacefully while you leaned your head on his shoulder, a smile on your face and a scowl on his.
♱ — dolor — ♱
A/N: Hey guys, I'm back with a new fic, yes I was gone for like 5 months or 3 or smth. This idea was inspired by @sinclairdoll, and his idea, here! I#bringbacktheoldnoir
WARNING: angst, sad, tw!new noir.
PAIRING: Black Noir x reader
WORD COUNTER: 865
Life was never normal after he died, you really didn't get it. Tears filled up your lashline, as you started sniffling to yourself. Your eyes staring at the photo in your hand, I mean you two were supposed to be together forever, that is what he wrote to you. Giving you sticky notes with his cute cartoony character drawn on the bottom.
You tried to hide your smile from him and ultimately failed, as your lips spread into a grin. You loved it when he drew you pictures, especially of those old Vought cartoons, you always collected every single note or picture, displaying and saving them away. But it was never the same, on the fateful day, it wasn't like it was raining, or something bad╼or maybe there was.
You would always share your feelings and opinions with Noir, voice out your deepest secrets or what was bothering you. You would have thought you did the same for him, well you tried. He was always quiet around you, I mean I guessed he couldn't help it with everything that happened to him. You thought you would live your life with him, but I guess faith had other things in mind.
There weren't any cards or a funeral for him. It was all under the wraps, just how Vought liked it. I mean being a Vought employee yourself, you would understand, no?
You saw it yourself, no secondhand point of view to see it with you. You watched with horrified, shock maybe in disbelief, watching him die. You weren't supposed to be there, nobody was supposed to be there. But you saw everything, Homelander just viciously ripping out his intestine, it was a nightmare, you wanted it to end, maybe stop him. If you did you would just be another part of the collateral damage, but you kind of wished you did do something, maybe it wouldn't be so bad if you were able to be with Noir.
When he died, it felt like something you died with him, maybe your morale, your laughter, your hope...gone, it was all gone.
Time passed by you, days turning into weeks, piecing your life together but all grief consumed you whole, you were in a spiral that you didn't want to come out of, a deep depression, that all you could of though of was your past, what you could do to stop him, maybe if you stopped him from leaving you, leaving your apartment, he would have been here with you.
You looked at the ceiling with a blank stare,
But soon or later you were able to leave that dark place you were in, though the pain was still in your heart and panged. You couldn't wish for him back, it was too painful to even think about him without breaking down.
Walking down the halls of the unforsaken building you worked at, you hated, you didn't really know why you were still here. You grumbled to yourself as you walked, fixing the hems on your shirt cuffs until your eyes set themselves on a familiar person.
You were surprised by the revelation.
You wanted to cry, maybe yell, or just jump. You looked in disbelief as the very man you loved walked by you, no hug, no talking, no..nothing. Your heart yearned for anything from him, you were still shocked at how he was still alive.
You watched Black Noir, Earving die in front of your eyes, maybe it was some time of miracle. You felt your throat getting dry, your eyes watering up, and your mind was torn. By the time you knew it, you were already walking toward him, not running toward him.
"Black Noir" You called, you watched as Noir turned towards you. You felt your tears dripping down your cheeks, and you stopped in front of him. "Do I know you?" Your eyebrows furrowed, as you listened to his voice, no way..he talked. I mean he never talked in front of you or around you, maybe he was healed in some way to start talking again,
But your heart panged at the unfamiliar words he used to greet you, "You..talk?" You stammered, "You know whatever, do you remember me, Y/N" You cracked a smile in the joy that it was really happening, tears welling up in your eyes again.
You heard the man you thought was Noir curse under his breath, which confused you a bit, "Sorry, ma'am I don't think I know you" He stammered, you were able to grab his hand before he was able to walk away from you, "Please, just try to remember" You whispered, your voice breaking, you were already a mess, tears escaping you.
He quickly shook his head and took your hands off his arm, before he walked away from you, leaving you a mess on the floor.
It was cruel, a cruel twist of fate, you felt like the ground was ripped out from beneath you, it wasn't fair. You struggled to process everything that led you to this point in life, it was complete utter torment to your mind and your heart.
Your tears dribbled down from your cheek onto the floor, you didn't even process the fact you were crying.
You were alone...
heartbroken,
—and crying on the floor to yourself.
@everyone:
Who wants to request any 'The Boys' fics from me <3 💫🌠
Freaky ahh a-train 😭💀💀
CW: NSFW no minors/ageless blogs!!! Also The Deep. Light spoilers, no beta
WC: 193
They love your ass, no question about it. They love watching the way your ass recoils from a slap, whether it's while you’re on all fours and arched for them, or if you’re just picking up something from the floor. That quote “hate to say goodbye but love to see you go?” Yeah, these guys are the definition, always watching how your ass moves as you walk.
BUTCHER, Kimiko, Frenchie, Victoria Neuman, Queen Maeve, Black Noir II, Firecracker, Ashley, Sister Sage.
Tits. No matter the size, they’re obsessed, always sneaking glances (or just straight-up staring) at your chest whenever they can. The obsession gets worse the lower the neckline and the tighter the fit is. Any time you’re alone, they’re nipping, sucking, and kissing your chest until you're moaning and squirming under them.
Starlight, Hughie, HOMELANDER, The Deep, Black Noir I, Soldier Boy, MM, Ashley (again), Joe Kessler.
Tits again, but they tell you for a different reason. They don’t want to reduce you to physical traits, they are in love with you and your personality. But your heart is right between your tits, right?
MM.
They say tits, but deep down they want someone with gills.
The Deep.
Feet.
A-Train.
𝜗 sweet 𝜚
My name is Nora. This is the only Tumblr page I have. I like to write for various types of fandoms.
𝐒𝐎𝐔𝐓𝐇 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐊
𝐊𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐔 𝐍𝐎 𝐘𝐀𝐈𝐁𝐀
𝐒𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐒
𝐒𝐂𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌
𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒
𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐒
𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐁𝐎𝐘𝐒
𝐀𝐂𝐑𝐎𝐒𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐏𝐈𝐃𝐄𝐑-𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐄
𝑮𝑬𝑵 𝑽
𝐇𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑 𝐆𝐀𝐌𝐄𝐒: 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐁𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐀𝐃 𝐎𝐅 𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐆𝐁𝐈𝐑𝐃 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐒𝐍𝐀𝐊𝐄𝐒
𝐉𝐔𝐉𝐔𝐓𝐒𝐔 𝐍𝐎 𝐊𝐀𝐈𝐒𝐄𝐍